Nom Nom Nom, I was dreaming of cotton candied cauliflower when rudely awakened by the door crashing open –
‘My Dear Fellow,’
my physician announced as he strode purposely into my bedchamber,
‘you really must desist from gnawing the lino and phone chargers – for not only are you incurring large repair bills but you are also endangering your skin!’
Alarmed I peered out from under my bedcovers and mumbled;
‘But I am King, and can do as I please!’
To which my physician replied, as he gingerly backed out of the room;
‘Tell that to Saint Peter when you arrive early at the pearly white gates, your stomach bloated and your fur all frizzy.’
Shamefaced I muttered something unrepeatable as I reached for my breakfast tray – a veritable smorgasbord of veggie delights with herbs, and a few ripe red flowers to add a little colour on a dreary morning.
As I ate, I made a mental note to withhold favour from my meddlesome medic. And to request that ‘housekeeper’ arrange to keep the nuisance nibblies out of my reach – for I am weak willed and rather partial to plastic.
Breakfast finished, I turned over to continue to snooze but Queen Niddy had other ideas. Predictably, we ended up doing what bunnies are renown for and the day suddenly looked much brighter.
Now, you might wonder why I share such intimate details of my life – and so I will explain: both diet and sex are important for a person to live a happy and healthy life and I have it from my mentor in the sky that God loves a fellow who enjoys his physical being and prowess and definately doesn’t frown upon ladies who likewise celebrate their womanhood.
I predict a few raised eyebrows for this shared truth, but truth it is, and so I command you, my subjects, to desist in judging those deemed licentious* and lighten up and make the most of your bodies for you are a long time dead in between reincarnations!
*I should caution that this applies to consenting adults only!
Have time to read some more? Why not binky on over HERE?..
should you fancy something a tad more serious take your floofy hot tail over HERE.
When you see a street performer do you stop a while, enjoy the act, then toss a few coins into their hat by way of appreciation? If yes I invite you to think the same of my efforts here ~ for, whilst Royal, I have bills to pay and the hay man wants his dues this Friday!